the struggle is really really real.

Evening,

Needed to do something to calm me down, so ranting on about how much I am struggling seems like an approriate course of action.

Basically this project is becoming the bane of my life, never have I ever felt so depressed, deflated and exhusted over a bloody 8 week project. It is mentally draining as the subject matter is so philosopical and I really did not enjoy philosophy at school.

EVERYPLACE IS BOTH A PLACE AND A NON PLACE. WHAT. This is why I am still struggling, I just cant work out an idea that would please my lecturers.

I liked my idea at the beginning but when it come around to doing the very public pieces I have to do, I freeze then want to cry and spew in sync. I think I am driving my mother and my boyfriend mad with my pussy attitude as they see the potential in my idea but I cannot.

Im really disapointed in myself for letting a project get me so upset, I cant sleep, eat or function properly as I am concious of the fact that if I eat I'm wasting time, if I sleep I'm wasting time and obviously working my arse off at actual work is not getting any project work done.

Ive got such a negative attitude and I doubt that will change any time soon, Ive prepared for failure..although I dont know how I would cope remediating this bloody project as I would quite like to put it to bed.


I'll let you know how I get on, as I think I've had my rant for tonight.

Off for a voddy.



x